Cigarettes and Calpol

Attempting to make sense of parenthood, life, love, and my own mind.

Matt’s Mega Mackerel

You know when somebody has that one dish that they just totally nail and it’s so good you could eat it forever? This is that dish in our house. Thanks to Honest Fish and morning sickness ruining fish for five months we have a freezer that is still pretty well stocked with the most beautiful, local mackerel.

This is the perfect dish if you’re not to sure about mackerel or are fairly new to fish (which I was, I’m such a fish wimp!), the sauce stops it being too ‘fishy’ and the super crispy skin is amazing! Even my mum liked it, and my mum is the ultimate fanny when it comes to fish.

You may notice something different about this recipe post, there are shit loads of photos. Matt is so much better at this blogger life than me (although funnily enough I still have to be the one to type it up…)

There was a disagreement on the name of this recipe. Matt wanted ‘Matt’s Mega Mackerel Surprise’ or ‘Roger’. This is my life. Sympathy flowers welcome.

Continue reading “Matt’s Mega Mackerel”

Damn Fine Lasagne

This is another recipe that’s taken from a Jamie Oliver one and adapted to be easier, less pretentious, and (not to toot my own horn) more delicious!

I’ve made a lot of lasagnes in my time; from the basic, shit, sugar-filled jarred types with associations of a certain (quite racist?) puppet family, to the most dry, bland, homemade attempts – usually with added peas, why did I add peas?! The one thing that’s always gone to shit with my lasagne attempts is they always go sloppy. It’s more of a soup with some pasta sheets. They might have tasted good but it don’t look pretty on a plate! Finally I think I’ve cracked it with this one!

This recipe looks long and complicated, but it’s not actually that bad! Plus you have leftovers to freeze and there’s a dinner ready for another night. Boom! Mum win!

Continue reading “Damn Fine Lasagne”

Fear of Breastfeeding

When I had my daughter I was unsure about many aspects of parenting. Would I cosleep? Would I let her cry it out? Would I have any fucking idea of how to do any of it (spoiler – I didn’t)? But one thing I was sure of, without a shadow of a doubt, was that I would breastfeed.

I knew all the benefits – for health, for bonding, for my wallet. Who wouldn’t be sold on that?! And I was sure I wasn’t ‘blessed’ (*slow look to camera*) with these H cups for nothing.

Turns out breastfeeding wasn’t as easy or as blissful as I was sure it would be.

Continue reading “Fear of Breastfeeding”

Mini Babymoon

I’ll admit it, I always thought the idea of a babymoon was a bit wank. I don’t know if it’s the horrendous name, the ultra-smug Binky and JP style photos of a two-week break in Hawaii, or just me being a grumpy cow, but I never thought a babymoon was something I’d get on board with.

Considering I’m always happy to find an excuse to run away for a night or two it does seem a bit stupid that this was one I was willing to ignore. But luckily I had a last minute change of heart and booked us a night away in a beautiful hotel with a pool and an amazing restaurant and boy am I glad I did!

Continue reading “Mini Babymoon”

Maternal Mental Health

[Trigger warning for suicidal thoughts]

If, like me, your social media feeds have been full of ‘shouty selfies’ (my opinion on selfies for ‘awareness’ is for another post, another day) and incredible stories of brave women overcoming PND you’ll be aware that this week is Maternal Mental Health Awareness Week. Something that I (obviously) feel very strongly about and am 100% behind.

However when it came to sitting down and thinking about my own input into the conversation I found myself a bit lost. I didn’t know at all where to start.

Continue reading “Maternal Mental Health”

Stretch Marks, Marketing and Self-hate.

Some of you might have the pleasure of watching me talk shite on Instagram stories on a regular basis, others of you might believe you have more important things to do with your lives (you’re wrong). Those of you that do may have seen my little rant about creams and oils aimed at pregnant bellies, and the negative marketing that they use. Well I’m still going on about it because, honestly, it really got me fired up.

Continue reading “Stretch Marks, Marketing and Self-hate.”

Celebrating Myself…

I am not good at celebrating myself. At all.

The idea of throwing a party in the name of me fills me with absolute dread. Because surely nobody else really gives a shit?!

Birthdays come down to ‘I’m going to this pub, come if you want, or don’t, whatever’ and I don’t think I could so much as dream of actually throwing a wedding and I definitely couldn’t have a hen.

Yet I love, love, love organising this stuff for other people! Give me half a chance to organise your hen party, birthday, or even just work’s leaving drinks and I will be snapping at you ankles like a Chihuahua on heat.

Continue reading “Celebrating Myself…”

Kids Come With

The more parents I connect with online and in real life the more I realise something I’ve been doing for years without even noticing it. I see people posting about their child-free friends and how much they love their children, how their favourite days are when they all hang out together, and how their friends are an extension of their family – aunties and uncles to their kids.

And I realise I’ve been keeping my social life and my parent life completely separate for nearly six years.

Continue reading “Kids Come With”

Fish Fingers

Fish fingers. Every parent’s go to ‘shit I forgot to cook dinner’ dinner. Nobody is denying the use, ease, and tastiness of a certain bearded man’s frozen fish finger. However, there’s something really satisfying and fun about making your own. Especially if you have one of your kid’s friends round for tea, you’ll look by far the most accomplished in the playground.

Luckily, it’s also really bloody easy (as we know, my favourite kind of cooking) and you can get the kids to do the messy bits! Hurrah!

Continue reading “Fish Fingers”

Create a website or blog at

Up ↑