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Cigarettes and Calpol

Attempting to make sense of parenthood, life, love, and my own mind.

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pregnant

Being Pregnant in a Heat Wave

I don’t know if you’ve noticed but it’s a little bit hot outside. If you go anywhere in England where there is a patch of grass right now you will see at least 12 sets of sunburnt shoulders frantically necking canned cider and pretending like they’re enjoying every second.

The Great British Summertime!

Pimms, Aperol, prosecco, cider…basically it’s just booze and sunburn. What’s not to love?

Unless of course you just so happen to be overdue, in which case a heat wave is the equivalent of being stuck in a lift with Boris Johnson and Piers Morgan.

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Third Trimester

The final countdown to D-Day. When suddenly everybody wants to know how your nipples are feeling and to give you their tip on how to get labour started (I hate pineapple, and I hate you for suggesting it).

The third trimester is the longest three (possibly longer) months you’ll ever face and everything hurts and who knew you could sweat from there and oh GOD get it out of me!!

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Mini Babymoon

I’ll admit it, I always thought the idea of a babymoon was a bit wank. I don’t know if it’s the horrendous name, the ultra-smug Binky and JP style photos of a two-week break in Hawaii, or just me being a grumpy cow, but I never thought a babymoon was something I’d get on board with.

Considering I’m always happy to find an excuse to run away for a night or two it does seem a bit stupid that this was one I was willing to ignore. But luckily I had a last minute change of heart and booked us a night away in a beautiful hotel with a pool and an amazing restaurant and boy am I glad I did!

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The Gender Detectives

One of the most common questions you’ll get once you reach a certain stage of pregnancy (after they ask your due date) is ‘do you know what you’re having?!’. I can confirm that whatever you respond here it will be wrong, sorry to be the one to break it to you…

You will at some point in your pregnancy be accosted by some old lady in M&S, or by your third cousin (twice removed) at a family wedding, or by your inlaw’s next door neighbour, and they will need to know the sex of your unborn child.

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Second Trimester Bliss?

Last week I had the sudden (and slightly terrifying) realisation that I’d officially hit my third trimester. After a few deep breaths, an extra ice lolly, and a panicked few hundred pounds of baby paraphernalia on Matt’s credit card I had calmed myself down.

I have since then also realised that I haven’t really posted a pregnancy update since my first trimester whinge. I’m sure this is devastating to all so here you go! The second trimester, why it’s still a bit shit.

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I’m not ok, is that ok?

If you’ve ever been pregnant, looked at a parenting blog, read anything, anywhere about growing and pushing out a baby, or just paid attention to the press surrounding childbirth and postnatal experiences you’ll have heard about postnatal depression (PND) or postpartum depression (PPD). It’s discussed a lot. As it should be! Awareness and understanding are essential for people to feel safe discussing their own experience with mental illness and seek help. There’s been another big push on PND awareness recently, with Chrissy Teigen’s amazing open letter about her experiences (which is incredible and spot on and so honest and everybody really should read it) to the recent surge in reporting of the 1 in 10 statistic. PND is having a moment, a moment I wish had happened before the birth of my daughter, it would have made things much easier and I would have gotten help much sooner than 12 months postpartum.

That statistic, however, is the same during pregnancy. 1 in 10 pregnant women will experience depression during their pregnancy. The same amount of women and yet we’re still not talking about it.

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Due Date

‘When are you due?’ is probably the question you hear most throughout pregnancy. And understandably so. You use it to gauge what symptoms somebody’s suffering, when they’ll be able to drink wine again, how long you have to plan a baby shower, and some people like to shout a star sign at you. I don’t mind being asked, but I have started answering in a way people aren’t used to.

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Child-free and Full of Questions – Pregnancy

When I shared my post about the first trimester I had a lot of women who hadn’t had children messaging me with comments and questions and ‘oh my god is it really that bad?!’s. I realised that I have a lot of readers who aren’t parents, so I decided to start a new mini series of questions they want to know the answers to – the weirder, grosser, and more intrusive – the better!

First up we’re talking pregnancy!

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Induction, Nudity, and No Stitches: My Birth Story

I’ve been thinking a lot about labour recently, being pregnant will do that to you! The first time you’re pregnant you have literally no way to know what it will feel like, how it will happen, or really how you want your birth to go. The second (or third, fourth, fifth) time you know what’s coming, for some mothers that makes it less scary, for others it makes it much more so.

One of my favourite types of blog to read is a birth story. So here’s mine. This all happened nearly six years ago so it’s a little murky, apologies for that. I’ll try and live stream my next one to make up for it.

So settle down with a cup of tea and a good old fashioned gulp of gas and air and lets do this!

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